GASPARILLA- 1 LAUREN- 0

It started out like this: "I don't really care if we don't go to Gasparilla, we have no one to watch the kids and I don't really feel like drinking."

 

It ended like this:

This will mark my 100th Gasparilla, give or take. Gasparilla Lauren comes out once a year around this time. It used to start off with 8am Jell-o shots and by 10am I would sprain my ankle and jump around for mad beads until I couldn't walk anymore. Ok, well that was one year. I was in a cast for a few weeks until I cut it off.

In my entire life I have missed a total of 3 Gasparilla's , 1) when I was at Superbowl, 2) last year it rained and 3) the year of "I'm a mom now and I can't do that" (I got over that REAL fast).

This year started off with my BFF coming into town and wanting to "meet up" as many of you know, if you don't go together you never "meet up". Phones don't work and the "I'm by the big white slinkie on Rubiduex and the cheesesteak stand, right by the row of Port o Potty's" doesn't cut it!

So we dropped the kids off at some stranger's house and off we went....the anxiety and anticipation of Gasparilla is phenom. "will I get drunk? will I have fun? who will I see? how many beads will I catch? will there be a whore next to me showing her tits and getting all the beads?" runs through my head each year. You have to pick your spot and pick it wisely. You have to be in a grassy area yet you HAVE to get right on the gates so you can yell and get beaded. I did just that.

There were "vodka out of Wade's trunk" shots. Let me tell you about my friend Suede. Suede and I go way back, back to the Newport smoking, burgundy Sentra driving days where he thought he was thug and I thought I was cool enough to be cooler than he was. Wade is the staple of many friend groups, but wherever you go Wade will ALWAYS have to poop. So we hung out, he wanted a cheesesteak but only wanted a bite because if he ate anymore he would have to find a bathroom. You see, he can't pooh in port a potty's so we have to find a bathroom, it makes it for a lose lose situation for my friend Sued-o. So he drinks instead of getting his cheesesteak and then down he goes. I made fun of his shirt ALL day because he looked hot, not sexy, but damn right sweaty. I offered to buy him a shirt but couldn't find any smalls. So the striped Structure button down stayed on him all day long. 

 I had the best day and there were so many funny moments. I don't have pictures of all the funny but here's a few.  I lost my socks and boots then found them. Then lost them again and found them. 

I played in the grass, kissed pirates, drank brews, made fun of people, laughed, got dizzy, hungover, dizzy again then walked 2 miles with bead neck. My voice is beyond raspy and sexy and not gonna lie,  I'm still a little fuzzy. 

It's my day, I own it and I love it. Chance's house is always the meet up spot, it's a beautiful house right off Bayshore by the white slinkie thing.Tennille won the yearly (we just started this year) "Ryan and Tennille" calf contest 

Tennille wins....

My Sis shared a corn dog with me.

Since I am obsessed with the show Dexter, I HAD to take a picture with Masuka, the chinese look a like cop.

 I came home and had some Pirate stamp on my stomach, that I don't remember.  I had to PEE the whole day and here was my PEE pose.

Ok, so I didn't win the "mom of the month" award this month, but that's ok I won it last month so I'll give someone else a chance. I heart Gasparilla more than you know.  

(for those of you non-Tampons) The Gasparilla Pirate Festival is an annual celebration held in the city of Tampa, Florida. Held each year in late January and hosted by Ye Mystic Krewe of Gasparilla and the City of Tampa, it celebrates the apocryphal legend of José Gaspar (Gasparilla), supposedly a SpanishSouthwest Florida. The theme is an "invasion" by Gasparilla and his men, which begins when the "Krewe" (made up of residents of the city) arrives on a 165' long pirate ship, the Jose Gaspar, in Tampa Bay and land near downtown Tampa. The mayor of Tampa then lends the key of the city to the pirate captain and a parade ensues down Bayshore Boulevard, one of Tampa's major streets. The krewes throw beads, coins and other items while shooting blank pistols from floats during the parade. The average attendance for the event is over 400,000 people. The parade is broadcast every year on WFLA-TV, and has been since 1955. According to the event's official website, 2003's Gasparilla parade effected an economic impact of nearly 23 million dollars to Tampa.